One problem many parents might face with children is their lack of urge to study or start on their homework. The advent of technological gadgets such as computers is not doing anything to help the situation.
To overcome the problem, first find out or observe what is discouraging your child’s progress.
According to research on mindsets carried out by Prof Carol Dweck from Stanford University, some of the factors stopping children’s drive for success include a wrong learning mindset and negativity. The lack of motivation could also be due to bad past experiences or impatience for results.
So, motivate your child by developing the right mentality in them and turn their passion into action.
» Eliminate negativity
Some children feel unmotivated because they feel incompetent. Sometimes, this could be due to parents’ negative comments like "You’re stupid" or "Why aren’t you as good as the rest?"
These remarks make children lose their motivation to study because they will feel they are naturally stupid, incapable and there’s nothing that they can do about it.
So, highlight your child’s positive traits instead and help them use these traits as motivating factors to drive their desire to do better in studies.
» Enforcing discipline
It is important to instil in your child the habit of doing homework and studying so that it becomes a routine that comes naturally and not as something that is very difficult to do. For example, make 8pm the study time every night.
Set realistic and reasonable rules like if they don’t finish their work or study, they won’t get their TV time. Then they’ll have a motivation to start their homework and do their revision.
» Compliment effort
Appreciate your child’s effort. When children feel that their hard work is valued, they are likely to keep trying and keep working.
Brilliant children might stop putting in an effort if they are praised merely for being intelligent.
They may either feel over-confident with their natural ‘talent’ or they want to stay on the top and not make mistakes, so they don’t want to move forward. It stunts their motivation.
According to Dweck, the key to overcome this is to praise children’s effort and not their intelligence. Intelligence can be developed through effort, but without effort, intelligence can only bring you that far.
» Failures as lessons
Help your child see failures as learning opportunities. When your child did badly in his test, motivate by telling him that the mistakes in the test are lessons that will help him improve.
From these mistakes, he will learn the correct answers to the questions so that he won’t repeat the same mistakes next time.
Every mistake serves a purpose; help your children see the positive in every mistake so that they will continue to stay motivated even when they fall.
Motivation and drive can be developed in a child if you nurture the right mindset – that success comes with hard work, patience and very often, failure is the key to success.
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